Short roots: First impressions on the strangeness of short term

On a Monday or Tuesday, I let our social worker know that we would be willing to do short term "respite" or "emergency" care--basically overnight babysitting for if a foster family needs a break, or sometimes if the county/agency receives a child on short notice and needs a place for them to stay that night while a more permanent place is found. Only certified families can provide this service.

On Wednesday afternoon around 2:30, I got a call that there was an opportunity available for us to help out. A sibling set was homeless for the evening after their previous home, apparently on short notice, was unable to keep them anymore. Abrupt, perhaps, but I can't judge without knowing. We only needed to take one kid for the night while a new home was found for them, hopefully together. 

By 5:00 the children were waiting at the local office to be picked up. I told Nate we were having a new friend over for the evening, and anxiously drove over. Walking in to where the kids were playing with the other respite foster mom, I was suddenly paralyzed. One child was crying.  Did they know what was going on? What had they been told? What kind of explanation could I, a stranger, give them before walking out the door with one of them? Should I first reassure them that they would see each other tomorrow, or not since no one really knew that for sure?   

But, with the social worker's prodding to go ahead and "rip off the band-aid" I offered my arms to the small, speechless toddler I was taking. Without a complaint or even much hesitation the child agreed to be held, carried outside, and strapped into my car next to my son (who was excited about his new friend). Just like that, we drove off. Call me a softy, but my mind and heart didn't know what to make of it. This kid was obviously more used to this unnatural scenario than I was. 

Although at first I had no idea what feeding level to expect, our dinner guest turned out to be a willing eater, and pretty quickly got comfortable playing with Nathan, although often seeming to look to me as a point of contact, if you will. Since I was the pickup person, was I the one link there was to stability or certainty of previous life? Perhaps. 

At bedtime, although sleepy, the child was reluctant to be left alone in the crib (for any number of understandable reasons)... Does one ever sleep-train a foster child, or is there too much inconsistency? I decided not to fight it for just one night and moved a toddler bed to the side of my own and laid down. Satisfied that I was not leaving, my little friend gladly laid down to sleep as well. 

The night passed with just a few restless wakings that were quickly quieted by a bottle of milk (or water). Not bad, all things considered. 

In the morning, just as we were told (even if for a moment there was talk that we might be needed for a few more days) a kind DCFS worker came, knowing little but the child's name (at first didn't even realize I was just a respite caregiver), and took Nate's new friend away to a "more permanent placement" while he looked on and wimpered. 

Then we went back inside and tried to act like nothing was different. 

NOTE: yes, you too can help a foster child like this, even if just for a night or two. ;)

Best laid plans

We've known we didn't want to wait much longer on another biological kid, even if we did have to wait on becoming foster certified first... So we were pretty excited, within the same week of receiving our certification, to find out we were also expecting! We still had no idea how God would time a foster baby placement in relation to the due date of the biological one, but we trusted he would figure it out better than we could. 

I had a couple concerns though, since I had so recently had my appendicitis and ovarian cyst (and had been feeling a little extra stretching near that area), so I managed to get an early 6 week ultrasound to make sure all was going well. It was Scott's Friday off, so he and Nathan came too. 

I had been praying that we'd be able to hear a heartbeat, and as the technician moved the wand around I was just anxiously awaiting the assurance that everything was okay. I barely registered her question when she asked, as if making conversation or taking notes for paperwork, "so, do twins run in your family?" At first I stumbled over my words, unsure whether to give her a straight answer (Scott's Dad is identical) or tell her "that's not funny!" But Scott was more clued in and started laughing in disbelief as she gave him a knowing look. "Yeah, you guys are having twins."  I gaped like a fish and finally grinned...This couldn't be real! How unlikely, how lucky, how ridiculous was this?! 

But there we were, twin parents. I'm going to get so huge! I thought. And I should probably prepare myself for the possibility of a c section. But how could I complain? What a crazy and exciting adventure.

And yet, I still have to acknowledge the lingering bit of sadness in my heart over the fact that we most likely won't be meeting our first foster child this year. I had looked forward to the thought of our second child being adopted, and maybe even being there to welcome a third (biological) sibling to the family (although it is possible we still may not have gotten a placement by then). As much as it is hard for me to give up for now, especially after getting this far, I am pretty sure that going from one child to four in the same year would be a bit much. It seems the Lord has made it pretty clear that our time for adoption is not yet... It is ironic and even humorous, as we had said to ourselves, "the only thing that could change our foster plans now is if we got pregnant with twins! Well. God laughs at our plans sometimes, doesn't he? We will still keep up our certification and keep praying for His direction and will for 2017!  But in the mean time, just as we hoped, those two cribs in the nurserywill be put to use and we will end 2016, Lord willing, with two more children in our arms. They will just be a bit closer in age and looks than we thought ;)

Cranberry oat bread

I finally found the perfect cranberry bread recipe! Soft and chewy. This recipe was originally for a bread maker but I adapted it, you can find the original here http://allrecipes.com/recipe/229268/cranberry-oat-bread/

 

One cup very warm water (105-110 degrees to be exact)

2tsp active dry yeast 

1 TB butter 

2 TB honey (I estimated so it was a bit generous 😆 )

Optional: a couple drops of vanilla and/or almond extract

Combine the above ingredients in your mixing bowl, stirring gently to dissolve the yeast, and let it "proof" (start to get foamy) while you gather the dry ingredients.

1 cup whole wheat flour

1 1/2 cup bread flour

1/3 cup rolled oats (not quick unless that's all you have)

3/4 tsp salt

1 tsp cinnamon 

Blend the dry ingredients and add them to the wet. I used my mixer with the bread dough hook, adding a little extra bread flour (a heaping spoonful at a time) until the consistency was right: the dough should be well mixed and not sticking to the bowl, smooth and not too sticky to the touch. Oh, I almost forgot, the cranberries! Add them towards the end.

3/4 cup dried cranberries, give or take as you like

Nuts optional but the oats give it texture already.

Mix it and knead it until it is an even consistency, not too sticky and the cranberries are well Incorporated. Shape into a ball and coat lightly with oil and put it either in the mixing bowl covered with a towel, or loosely covered with saran wrap to rise. 

Rise for an hour or until just about doubled in size, then smush it down and roll or shape it to fit in the greased loaf pan. Beware that if the first rise is is too long, your yeast will lose steam for the second one. Let rise again about 20 or 30 minutes, until it is just cresting the edge of the pan. I sprinkled the one pictured with more oats (and pressed them in a little) before rising the second time. 

Bake at 350 for 30-40 minutes.... Then enjoy! 

 You will probably be sad that this only makes one loaf, since it will be gone in a day or two. Double it once you get the hang of it ;)